Monday, January 17, 2011

Story Time at the Apollo

I took Grace to story time at the library today. It was my first "mom" activity and I was nervous. It was a bad night and the appeal of cuddling in bed all morning was huge. I resisted, showered at 6:30 and nudged my little duckling away from the breast and more sleep. I put her in a girlie outfit, since, well, my daughter looks like a boy and wondered what 'mommies" are supposed to wear to such things. I opted for a button down and cords.

We were the second to arrive, the first was a little boy and his grandma. My fear was it would be all grandmas. I feel like the only person at home all day. Grace had a name tag, how cute! We settled in and chatted a little with grandma. After a few minutes another mom and little girl came in. Yay, someone my age! Grace snuggled in my lap and watched the other kids toddle around, chewing on her fingers and keeping quiet. A little later three more moms came in with some little ones closer to Graces age. We sang songs and and the librarian read books. And it was fun.Yeah I didn't know all the words and I couldn't see the board. Ha, it's like being back at school, but it was ok. Grace was a shy little angel.

I was getting us bundled up when I noticed the other moms chatting. I sucked it up and went to join them. They are sweet and enthusiastic. Everyone has the same goal, getting out of the house with other adults. I can get behind this if I can put my shyness aside. It reminded me of the first night of knitting, strangers with one love in common. I haven't traded my love of yarn for my love of Grace, but I need to work with this new part of my life.

Grace fell asleep in the car and slept for over an hour. Maybe we both need to expand the walls of the little nest we both love. .

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Break on Through

Grace had her first cold last week. Sad little sniffles and a cough, along with a low fever. She needed cuddles and nursing and I was happy to oblige. We camped out next to our new penguin shaped vaporizer. Which we all tried to pretend didn't look like it was exhaling the good shit. I didn't leave her for four days, at which point the walls were closing in. I left Grace with her Daddy and headed to Bath & Body Works and Trader Joes. I felt like a new woman when I got home.

On Monday, Grace was nibbling on my finger when I felt a small sharp poke. The thing I have been fearing is on it's way, a tooth! I don't know if it's the cause of the sleepless nights the last month or last weeks seeming cold. I guess only time will tell.

I finally made it to water aerobics yesterday, after one failed attempt and one sick munchkin. I had my own break through while there. I was so busy trying to learn the moves and stay afloat that I didn't worry about Grace for the entire hour. She was at home with my Dad, whom she adores and I knew she was fine. It was strange and freeing. I have been all consumed with her since I saw those two magical lines. It's been amazing and exhausting. The experience reminded me I need to move my body and free my mind more often.

Maybe the penguin can hook me up. :)

Sunday, October 31, 2010

B.Y.O.B.

It's been a tough week around here for night time sleep. Grace has been having screaming fits, sometimes in the evening and sometimes during the day. She isn't a big time screamer, more of a low level fusser. So much so that I took her to see Dr S on Tuesday to rule out an ear infection or possibly teething. When she turned down nursing I was getting worried. She checked out fine though and the doc put on his sleuth hat and asked me if anything had changed lately. At first I said no and then I remembered the probiotic drops I started her on a month ago, she ran out the previous week. I saw a few changes, but it was unclear whether they were just her tummy growing more mature or the drops. I can say for sure now that the drops make a huge difference in how she feels. I have to order them from Clarks Pharmacy, and they are a little pricey, $35 for a months supply, but worth it.

James and I are also feeling a bit on the tense side. Just one of those weeks where we are getting on each others last nerves. The lack of sleep isn't helping. Our schedule's are super crazy now and it's getting to us. I think we are doing the best we can, but I'm going to try to tweak a few things to make it easier for us both. With work for him and then cleaning, we just have no time in the evenings. That means we have to cram quality time as well as well as errands into two weekend days and it's not happening. Thankfully we have plenty of family to give us a hand with Grace and with cleaning when we need a break. Thanks Kim and Alex!

So here I am on a Sunday night facing another week. The good thing is the kiddo, as well as the hubby are asleep and I'm enjoying a Woodchuck Cider for the first time in almost a year. It's nice to have a few minutes to myself. I adore every second with my daughter, but a little break is needed tonight.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Beginning

I have discovered since Grace was born, three months ago, that I can talk about little else.   I don't want to become one of those moms so obsessed with their children they lose touch with their husbands and everyone else around them, yet here I am. The hubs and I are fine, despite the fact that in a sleep deprived rage I flipped out on him this morning. He earned it, trust me. I find myself going to write something  for my other blog and wondering if any of my knitting friends, my primary readers, care to hear about breastfeeding and milestones. Considering few of them have small children, I doubt it      

My other reason for a new blog is for myself and for Grace. I want a record of this crazy, precious, all too short time when she's small. A new blog for my new life and my journey in recreating it for my new family.

I can't promise quality or quantity, but I will promise honesty.